Reconcilliation of Incarnation

17/05/2010 by admin.

I don’t often get to read as much as I would like to just for pleasure but I did finish a book recently that really resonated with me.  It was about a lady who does past life regressions who had one guy in who regressed to alien lives and went in to detail about other ways of living and how the earth was set up and perceived by others.  I know not everyone currently accepts the ET hypothesis but it was fascinating and intriguing.  What resonated with me the most though was how this man who was her subject felt at the end of the book.  It felt like a treatise for the sensitive and mis-understood.I meet so many people through my work who are sensitive and hyper-sensitive it’s very common.  Some people deal with it by hiding from life, some cover over it with a steely exterior, some feel wounded by life, some feel cynical but often they feel that society as it is doesn’t fit.  I remember reading a book about the hyper-sensitive personality which said about 10% of the population had this trait.  It’s a shame that in the West it isn’t more recognised.

I have first hand experience of this personality trait and remember well the confusing emotions I had growing up and as a young adult.  The intensity of the world was quite over-whelming and I remembering feeling like a fish out of water.  I felt that I was from a different universe to the rest of my close family (though I’m not claiming any ET origins) and I found the confusion, pace and interactions in modern-day life quite overwhelming sometimes. Up until about the age of about 30 I had always felt apologetic for my existence.  I was the black sheep or the quirk.  I had such divergent beliefs to my close relatives that I was often ostracised.  I found it hard to gel with people in society and became, isolated, confused and cynical.  I worked hard to obtain a ‘sensible’ career earlier on believing that was a real job.  However I eventually realised that even if job I was doing sounded altruistic that I spent most of my time paper shuffling and achieving nothing profound in life or society terms.  So after a lot of challenges a journey of personal discovery, found the benefits of this trait and how to manage its challenges.  I finally stopped fighting against myself and found the acceptance I really wanted – acceptance of myself and this life I have chosen. 

This led to starting to work this energy a constructive way.  I always knew I was hyper-sensitive to energies and could connect to them but I learnt to manage this in a safe way to enhance life rather than feeling I should suppress this side of me because it challenged me. Today I am engaged in spiritual work and what a blessing that vocation is.  I have the opportunity to give an insight to help people enhance their journey.  Perhaps I’m still not changing the world on a dramatic scale but I still hold the hope that if there are people out there sprinkling light around then the 100^th monkey syndrome should at some point lift the consciousness of society to make it more balanced.

For the young man in this book how he felt after his regression sessions compared to before really interested me.  It reminded me of the end of the film Trainspotting where the main character basically said yes to life.  This insecure, reclusive man who had difficulty forming relationships ventured out in to the world to make these connections.  So rather than shying away from life due to fear of rejection he embraced his incarnation.  I will quote the part that really clicked with me below;

“Do you think these sessions helped explain where those feelings of uneasiness came from?”…         

“Yeah, I think that’s true.  I think it explains why I felt the dis-ease and the unfamiliarity.  The high ideals I hold for myself, I hold for other people.  And it really discourages me to see people being very prejudiced, very short, very… thieving and murdering and killing, all this stuff going on in the world.  It used to really bother me.  And I would use that as an excuse to say, ‘I don’t want to be here’.  Because this is just not the kind of a world that I want to be in.  I want something more orderly, cleaner, more stable, more in harmony.  what really hurt was that I found I wanted to be like everyone else.  And so I would start doing some of the things that I disliked in other people, to appear normal. I always felt I had to in order to fit in.  And that only added to my feelings of isolation and confusion and frustration…’

….”Because you were trying to go against your basic character.”…

…” I think I was afraid of myself, afraid because I didn’t know myself.  I was afraid to let anyone near me because I didn’t know myself.  I was afraid to let anyone near me because I didn’t know what I wanted.  And I think I was also afraid of getting hurt.  But now, I am starting to understand myself and I am beginning to see that I can find some things about myself that I can like.  I don’t have to be afraid or think I am different or odd because I can see that I am not much different from everyone else.  My problem was that I was expecting too much out of life.  I was expecting it to be here just like it is over there.  And I was always disappointed when I would see life not live up to my expectations…’                                                                                                                                                               “I realise that now, I was expecting more out of this life than I should have.  Now that I know, it makes the disappointments a lot easier to take because they aren’t so personal.  I discovered everyone feels the disappointments.  I’m not the only one.  This is just part of this existence, just part of being human… I know now that everything’s going to be all right.”

Keepers of the Garden, Dolores Cannon

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